Bathroom wall blues.
You know I spend a lot of time in the bathroom. It must be a genetic mutation, my fartza was a hippy but I like bathing. Whilst lying in a boiling hot tub I talk sing and laugh hysterically to myself. Afterwards when I join my family in the living room a silence descends and Mum Mad and Pootle, my two brothers stare at me. If this happens it means they have over heard me talking to myself. When I ask if they have Mad gives a 'witty' reply along the lines of, "The whole street heard you."My bathtime conversations with myself are now a family joke, Mad described the situation to my farza as, "You walk past the bath room when Boogie's in it and all you can hear is: mutter mutter tee hee hee la la la la."
Its not a surprise that my audience, the bathroom walls object to some of the songs the juke box in my brain chooses to loop. Up late on Friday I ran myself the usual scolding hot bath and whilst I waited I sat naked on the loo singing Bikini kills "I like fucking" a frequent number on the bathroom playlist. Half way through the much repeated song the tiled walls decided to challenge my choice of tune.
Immediately sparks began to fly of the walls, stars flashing yellow and black. They curved slightly as they slowly fell onto the carpet. More stars replaced the ones that had already fallen to the floor, lots of these minute stars where braking out from the mold lined, pink flowered tiles. I found this rather disturbing and after blinking and rubbing my eyes to get rid of them I realized they wouldn't go away. Then I did what any normal mentally stable person would do in this situation, I sat on the toilet whimpering until they finally disappeared. I continued with my bath but not a single Bikini Kill line passed my lips.
The walls in my bathroom have plently of right to protest, I do sing that song way to much and do not blame them in the slightest of getting bored of it. I will now extend the playlist of songs that I know the words to, to give a nice variety of music for my changing audience.
Walls cannot live on Bikini Kill alone.
BOOGIE
* Disclaimer: No illegal substances where used in the making of this blog. Scary huh?!
posted by Boogie @ 12:13 AM
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