Another class 'A' rant from Naomi.
When Naomi is exercising or drunk she increases her volume, a lot. She will start stringing her sentences together in a high pitch squeal which is similar to the sound of a pig being tickled. She then inserts this constant flow of words with a giggle.Two Fridays ago there was a springtime wave of heat, the sun lasted throughout the day making everyone at school more happy and relaxed. On Fridays we have double P.E. two hours last lesson before rushing home. On this particular Friday by the second lesson we where already hot and tired from playing rounders in the sun. Our P.E. teachers let us choose our last activity of the day. Most people went to do trampolining leaving a small group including me and my friends to play basket ball.
We divided ourselves into two groups the only boy being on the opposing side. This boy was Keith. Keith is very tall and good at basket ball, he lives a few doors down from Naomi. When he plays his drum kit on a Sunday she can hear him through the walls, her Mum used to babysit Keith when he was younger, Naomi knows lots about him. Keith smokes shit loads of pot, when he makes jokes all the girls around him titter, even when they're not funny. He also happens to be Naomi's arch enemy.
Here was Naomi tall aggressive and owning the skills needed to be a good basket ball player. On the other team was Keith. Sometimes it seemed like there was only the two of them playing head on. Naomi was getting red in the face from effort, and kept adamantly refusing the opportunity to sit on the substitutes bench. You could see that she had to beat him, hate rays shot from her pupils onto Keith. She squinted her lids in concentration
After the game she was like a madwomen. She began start one of her famous rants, trying to calm her down I mentioned that she was behavior was similar to that on New years eve when she spent an hour raving about how the "Buffy the vampire slayer" manual was nothing like the T.V program. When she heard this she laughed and continued her ravings from that evening, suddenly they where cut short as she became distracted.
We where passing Keith in the hallway. . . . a torrent of words sped from her mouth. Accusing him of attempted murderer because he tried to kick her in the ankle and saying he was a cheater because he had tried to kill our team, with her voice raced comically high. I have never seen anyone look so dumbfounded, Keith was truly lost for words. Even as I was pulling her down the corridor she was still screaming at him, "Keith you bar-stard Im going to throw you in the pool," pant, pant, pant "you should be tried for attempted murder, Im going to get you who wants to help me throw Keith in the pool?!" I saw Keith mouth, "What the fuck?" To his group of friends, each one of them looking as confused and scared as him. Our friends had abandoned us hiding themselves in the changing rooms so not to be associated with the crazed Naomi, but I was standing next to her laughing so hard I though my sides would split. Laughing so hard I couldn't breath. Laughing so hard their was tears in my eyes. It has to be one of the most funniest things I have ever seen.
"It must of been sun stroke." Naomi giggled as we burst into the changing rooms. After the bell rang signaling the end of the day Naomi flew from the changing rooms, "Miss have you seen Keith? I want to scare him again."
BOOGIE
posted by Boogie @ 2:08 AM
4 Comments:
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hehehhehehehe thats me crazy old naomi
poopoopoopoos
very true she is crazed loon. maby it was the heat?? or was it that she is actualy a mad robot sent to earth to kill everyone, and the heat melted her sanity chip........ scary!!!!
Thanks for that Kyle. That information makes all the difference when Im trying to sleep at night. ;-)
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